Modern day dating... Jks

Just no.

Simply put – it isn’t even dating.

If you’re fortunate enough to not have experienced this confusing dance, good on you.

But let me try and paint you a picture;

Picture this – two people, talking, but not talking too much, because god forbid you possibly coming across as having feelings/developing or otherwise for a person. You have to be totally nonchalant about this, I truly can’t stress this enough.

And then, you have to be available, but not too available. That means if you texted first last time, you now have to wait for their reply. No double texting. Also actually calling to chat is completely out of the question, ew who are you?

You also don’t go on a “date” you hangout, and hanging out may even seem like a date, there may be dinner, sex and a weekend away. Don’t be fooled though, oh no – this is still hanging out.

There is also the rule of not asking if they are talking/seeing other people, this would reflect back to point 1.

And I can’t forget, if someone cancels plans on you, this is “ok” because you were just going to “hangout” anyway – and don’t ask why your plans that may have even required a change in your own schedule are now being canned. Just go with it, you’re ‘easy breezy’

These are the social cues we now adhere to. But all of the above is so F**ed up. We live in a world whereby having feelings is the worst thing you possibly can do.

No one comes out saying “ I like you, will you go out with me” oh no that’s far too difficult and someone just actually said how they feel *gasps*

These situations though leave you always guessing yourself, always questioning, always not 100% sure where you stand with people, And let me tell you this, I am over it.

I can’t count the amount of times I have sat re-reading message, trying to analyze what this exactly means, but you can’t even ask – because that is being clingy, and hey “we’re only hanging out”.

But sh*t people, I can’t be the only one over this? I can’t be the only person re-wording message to come across completely not bothered over this, I can’t be the only one wanting some honesty, I can’t be the only one over “hanging out’ with someone for months to then never hear from them again?

I for one would like to go back a decade – I would like to be able to pick up the phone if I like someone, and arrange to see them. I would like to know where I stand with a person before ‘catching feelings’. I would like people who like each other to be honest about it, I would like people to also respect each other enough to do the right thing, and for people to stop making me second guess myself. It should be re-enforced that you are worth something. You are worth someone’s love, you are worth someone’s times and you are worth someone’s affection. #ellieisms #ellieforhonesty